Thursday, June 10, 2010

NFL Predictions 2008 - 2009



It's easy to pick the Giants, Cowboys, Patriots, or Colts. I am sure they won't all falter this year and some upcoming teams are ready to challenge. The NFL powerhouses are due for a fall. After all, the Giants had a second place division finish and made the predictable - unpredictable again. You have to love the chances of the Vikings, Saints, Bills, Browns, Jaguars, and Raiders. They will be the most improved teams who could challenge for it all.

2008 National Football Conference

NFC EAST

Dallas - Runs away from this division. Runs all the way to the Conference final. Romo falls for Vikings cheerleader who spikes Vikes Gatorade with Ex-Lax.

NY Giants - Sometimes everything falls into place. This year they will struggle to be a Wild Card and then it's all over for repeating.

Washington - Improved team, Enough to beat the Giants in the Wild Card game.

Philadelphia - Just don't have all the pieces in place.

NFC NORTH

Minnesota - Purple offensive monsters crush Dallas in the Conference final for a Super Bowl birth. Ex Lax makes them run faster.

Green Bay - Good all around strength but not good enough this year.

Detroit - How can a team go on and on without a quality quarterback?

Chicago - How can a team go on and on without a quality quarterback?

NFC SOUTH

New Orleans - Will be more consistent this year. Brees has a great year and defense picks it up a notch.

Carolina - Too much expectation and not consistent enough.

Tampa Bay - Boring. Boring. Boring.

Atlanta - Do they send the rejects here or are they created here?

NFC WEST

Seattle - Very well-rounded team. Could go all the way.

Arizona - Please change the name of the team to the Desert Rams.

St. Louis - Please change the name of the team to the Cardinals.

San Francisco - Please change the team.

2008 American Football Conference

AFC EAST

New England - Easy schedule poor training for playoffs. Bill Belichick is hung in effigy after Pats get bumped out by Jags.

Buffalo - Young defense gets monster-like. Will lose the Conference final to the Jags breaking the hearts of Buffalo fans again.

NY Jets - Not Brets fault but Farve gets carved with hapless Jets. Fans want everyone fired or executed.

Miami - The Tuna, the Dolphins, Ricky Williams. This is a very cheap version of a junior Cowboy team. Can somebody spell Q u a r t e r b a c k?

AFC NORTH

Cleveland - A year away from going all the way. They should watch old Browns black and white movies with Carlings Black Label commercials. Fake like they are hurt and kill guys like Jim Brown did.

Pittsburgh - Can look great - and then very average. Browns overtake them.

Cincinnati - Carson Palmer should demand a trade. Great talent on overrated team.

Baltimore - Locker room poison begins to flourish. Good team - no chemistry.

AFC SOUTH

Jacksonville - Defensive monsters go all the way to Conference Final.

Indianapolis - Not enough Marvin Harrison or Defense. Payton bring them back - next year.

Tennessee - Good team with ugly uniforms. Should watch old John Hadl Charger films. No passing - no playoffs.

Houston - Improved defense and team with very cool uniforms gets steadily better but not good enough yet.

AFC WEST

San Diego - Look for a little losing streak to start the finger pointing.

Oakland - Everyone will hate them. Except the Raider Nation. Now if they only had Lamonica.

Denver - Continues to dive. Jay Cutler would take Green Bay a long way but not this team.

Kansas City - Abner Haynes returns. These are not the Super Chiefs.

AFC - Jacksonville over Buffalo - as Bills miss controversial two point conversion to win it. Fans destroy Wilson stadium forcing the Bills to become the Toronto Maple Leafs.

NFC - Vikings over Cowboys - in a romp. Cowboys immediately trade Romo to the Dolphins for the Tuna. Jerry Jones gets face lift and now looks like Joan Rivers. Little Bum Phillips is elected coach of the year for putting up with more crap than any coach in history.

Super Bowl -Halftime show is Michael Phelps swimming 14 consecutive 200m swims across Tampa Stadium. Raiders Al Davis signs him as a tight end.

Tarvaris Jackson is injured as time winds down with the Jags up on the Vikes by 6. Gus Frerotte leads game ending drive as the Minnesota Vikings win the Super Bowl. Adrian Peterson gains 200 yds. with 3 TD's to become MVP.